Chapter 152 --> Beer Man

[Clarence]

Steve and Samantha are watching TV shows to get their minds off of the fact that Amanda is dead and everyone else is missing.

Samantha: This thing called television ... is so horrible and crazy.

Steve: You love it.

*ding dong*

Steve: The door! Maybe my son, cat or brother returned!

Steve runs to the door very excited and opens it to reveal ... the robot.

Steve: ...

Robot: STEVIE! BUDDY AND PAL! I HAVE BEEN RESTORED!

Samantha: Who or what is this?

Robot: I AM A ROBOT AND STEVE'S BEST FRIEND! STEVE! WHY HAVE YOU AGED SO MUCH AND WHO IS THIS NEW AND YOUNGER Shay YOU ARE DATING?

Steve: YOU'RE SUPPOSE TO BE LONG DEAD!!!

Robot: INDEED. LET ME TELL YOU OF THE WONDERFUL AND LENGTHY SEVEN-TEEN PART STORY THAT EXPLAINS MY MIRACULOUS RECONSTRUCTION!

Steve leaves the room and comes back with some kind of lead pipe.

Robot: I'M GOING TO BE PART OF YOUR LIFE NOW AND FOREVER!

Steve bashes the robot to pieces with the lead pipe!

~

Steve and Samantha are outside with a burning barrel going.

Samantha: So what was that about ...?

Steve: It's best to just forget about it.

Steve throws the final piece of the robot, his robot arm, into the fire.

~~~

Show an outlandishly large red bong and insane amounts of weed being loaded into it by female hands. We show some sexy female lips go up to the bong and inhale the weed enjoyably.

Woman: Yes ... this is soooooo good.

Suddenly Weed Man comes home to his weed garage and is covered in soot and wearing ruined Weed Man clothes.

Weed Man: Ummmm.... who are you?

Woman: Don't be silly, I'm your girlfriend!

Weed Man: Ok, I thought we broke up or something.... I can't remember things for some reason.

Weed Man lights up a sweet joint.

Woman: Don't worry baby, I'll be with you forever or until you run out of weed.

Weed Man: I need new clothes.

Woman: What happened to you anyway?

Weed Man: I was in a space ship that crashed.

Woman: That sucks .... all that happened to me today was that I saw a rabbit ... *inhales from bong* ... or I might not have....

~~~

Show a mysterious dark room .... in the room is an older woman dressed in strange clothing and fancy jewelry. She is sitting around a table with Steve and Samantha. In the middle of this round table is a strange crystal ball.

Psychic: I'm getting something!

Steve: Really?

Psychic: Yes.... very much so...

Steve: Can you find Dave, my son or my cats???

Psychic: I see ... a man with magnets where his hands should be.

Steve: Magnet Hands?

Psychic: Yes ... he plans on killing you...

Steve: Ok... Magnet Hands can't kill anyone.

Psychic (rubbing her hands over the crystal ball): A man in a cape ... he's going to kill you with a knife!

Samantha: Oh no!

Steve: Don't listen to her, she's full of shazam!. She doesn't know where anyone is!

Psychic: But I do!! I can feel the presence of your brother ... he's next door in the garage! And your wife ... she's not dead ... she's a pirate! And...

Steve: Ok, we're done here.

Steve stands up and turns on the lights to reveal they are in the mansion. Steve grabs the psychic by the arm and lifts her out of the chair.

Psychic: What are you doing???

Steve: I'm locking you in the basement with the other liars!

Psychic: But I still haven't got to tell you about the reptilian shape-shifters!!

Steve unlocks the basement door and shoves the psychic in to reveal a bunch of other psychics are trapped in the basement as well. Steve slams the door shut and locks it.

Samantha: Dad ... you gotta stop kidnapping psychics!

Steve: If they were so psychic they would have known they were gonna be kidnapped!

~~~

Show the workshop of the caped man that was hired by Magnet Hands to kill Steve.

The caped man puts new fuses into the fuse box and turns the power back on ... but nothing happens.

Caped Man: This is impossible! I have tried so many fuses from so many stores .... I might have a serious electrical problem here...

The caped man looks at his favourite but dull killing knife sadly.

Caped Man: I need to sharpen this knife with my grinder wheel! But I need to get the power back on to use it!

The caped man looks at his knife really determined.

Caped Man: This isn't over!!

~~~

Show Magnet Hands in a bar with his assistant, Regular Hands. Magnet Hands has a huge beer and Regular Hands just has a Mountain Dew.

Magnet Hands: Give me another sip of my beer!

Regular Hands: *sigh*

Regular Hands acts as Magnet Hand's hands and holds the beer mug so Magnet Hands can drink.

Magnet Hands (mumbling while drinking): MORE!

Regular Hands lifts the mug higher while Magnet Hands drinks and has beer spilled on him.

Magnet Hands: YOU IDIOT!!!!

Regular Hands: I'm sorry! smurf! Can I please have some beer too?

Magnet Hands: No damn it, you're the designated driver! Need I remind you that I have magnets where my hands should be?

Regular Hands: Man do you milk the shazam! out of that or what?

Magnet Hands *crying*: You don't know how hard my life is ....

Regular Hands: How did you end up with magnets for hands anyway?

Magnet Hands: I DON'T WANT TO TALK ABOUT IT WHEN I'M DRINKING!

Regular Hands: You are the worst drunk....

Magnet Hands: I'm depressed ok? I just need to kill Steroids Man so I can feel better about myself.

Suddenly we zoom into a man reading the news paper and the news paper blocking his face. He lowers the news paper. We reveal a man who looks unshaven and unkempt and is wearing a purple suit.

Strange Man: Did you say .... (dramatic zoom in) kill Steroids Man!?

Cut to the bar and a worker wiping down the counter.

Worker: Ummmm boss?

Boss: Yeah?

Worker: There's customers over there talking about killing Steroids Man again...

Boss: Eh, that happens every week, don't worry bout it!

~~~

Show Steve in pajamas go up to the lit fireplace and on the mantel, he picks up a tiny metal container.

Steve: Oh ... Amanda ... I miss you so HARD!

Steve begins making out with the tiny metal container while having a great erection.

*ding dong* the door bell rings...

Steve: huh?

Steve goes over to the door and opens it to reveal....

Steve: DAVE?!?!?!?!

It's Dave and instead of the Weed Man costume he usually wears, this time he's wearing a hippie sweater and tie dye pants.

Steve: Dave!!! It IS you!!!

Steve is overcome with joy that one of his missing family members finally came home and jumps out the doorway to hug Dave outside!

Steve and Dave spin around in circles while doing a loving hug.

Dave: Damn man... I guess you missed me, huh?

Steve: shazam!!!!!

Dave: What's wrong bro?

Steve was so excited that Dave came home that he forgot that he had the tiny metal container in his hands and spilt ashes all over the driveway while hugging.

Steve: I SPILLED MY DEAD WIFE ALL OVER THE YARD!!!!

Samantha comes downstairs in her pajamas and looks outside to see Dave is back and her Dad is crawling around in the yard.

Samantha: Dave! You're back! ... what are you doing Dad?

Steve: GET THE VACUUM!!

Samantha: I don't know what that is...

Steve runs in and gets the vacuum and runs outside after plugging it in... but the cord isn't long enough.

Steve: WHERE'S THE EXTENSION CORD!!?

Samantha: Ummm... not sure what or where that is either.

Steve: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!

Samantha: What's HAPPENING?

Steve: I SPILLED YOUR DEAD MOM ALL OVER THE PLACE AND THERE WAS ALREADY HARDLY ENOUGH OF HER LEFT TO FILL THIS TINY URN!!!!

Samantha screams in terror at this horrifying moment.

Dave (toking): Damn..... what happened while I was gone???

~~~

Show Steve and Samantha crying in the living room with Dave who is smoking weed. They are looking at a large transparent plastic tote filled with ashes ... and dirt and grass and other outside things.

Steve: Oh my ... (taking out a strainer) ... it's going to take forever to filter your Mom out of all this grass and dirt and things and ... what's this, a mushroom?

Samantha: STOP IT!!!!! THIS IS TOO MUCH FOR ME TO HANDLE!

Samantha puts a blanket over the tote filled with yard and ashes.

Samantha: This is too friggin morbid!!!

Dave: You guys need to hit this bong man, it'll make ya all feel better.

Steve takes the bong and hits that and exhales.

Samantha: What's that?

Steve: Just smoke it.

Samantha tries to smoke it but coughs and passes it back.

Samantha: I hate it!

Dave: So.... what's going on again? Is Amanda ok or....

Steve: NO!!!! She's dead!!! We had a funeral for her and everything!! You didn't figure that out!?!

Dave: Sorry man ... seriously, that sucks though man .... heavy stuff....

Steve: ... seriously? Is that all you got?

Dave: I feel for ya man ... but I'm just way too high to get sad.

Dave loads another pipe full of weed and gets it going.

Dave: So... where's everyone else?

Steve: They're missing! My son and the cats have disappeared! And by the way, where were you?

Dave: I was trapped in some kind of low budget remake of the Avengers ....

Steve: .... damn ... you're just so high .... I'm glad you're back though.

Samantha: Me too! Now if only we could find my brother and the cats....

Dave busts out this strange glowing cube he got from his last adventure ... he turned it into a bong.

Dave: Check out this sweet bong I made guys.

Steve: Damn ... that's really cool!

Samantha: So ... what now?

Steve: Well I think we should celebrate ... I mean things are shitty right now ... but Dave came home and I think we need to get our mind off things. Let's drink!

Steve busts out some beer and Samantha takes one and looks it over.

Samantha: What is this?

Steve: Just try it.

Samantha: I don't know...

Steve: Daddy knows best, so drink up, ok sweetie? It'll make you feel better!

Dave: Ummmm.... I'm not a father or nothing bro... but this seems sketchy.

Samantha tries the beer and spits it out.

Samantha: This tastes horrible! And that stuff I smoked hurt my throat ... I don't like doing these things, Dad.

Steve (to Dave): You'll drink with me ... right Dave? Brother?

Dave: Nah man, I'm a weed man, you know that.

Steve: Come on, have one beer with me.

Dave: Stop pushing the beer, man. I don't care to try it, buddy.

Steve: Try it?

Dave: Yeah, I never drank before... it doesn't seem like it would be my thing.

Steve: You never drank before???

Steve thinks back and honestly can't remember a time he ever saw Dave drink ... anything.

Steve: That's preposterous! Surely you've drank before at some point!

Dave: Naw man, not a drop in my life ... of anything.

Steve: Why not?

Dave: I been too busy smoking weed, dude.

Steve: Wow... so you sure you don't want to try it then?

Dave: If I try a sip can we move on and just get high for the rest of the night and maybe play video games?

Steve: You can but I plan on getting very drunk as well as very high.

Dave: Ok, let's try a sip of this then.

Dave takes a sip of the beer and his eyes grow wide! We zoom in to an intense look at his face and suddenly it seems like Dave has somehow instantly changed....

Steve: Dave? ... what do you think?

Dave suddenly looks very shocked and somehow different and begins gulping down his beer.

Steve: Damn I think he likes it!

Samantha looks concerned. Dave slams down the empty beer bottle.

Steve: I guess it turns out you like beer after all!

Dave: DAMN RIGHT!! Beer kicks bottom!!

Dave stands up and takes another beer and begins chugging it back and throws his bong away.

Steve: Ummmm... why did you just toss your bong aside?

Dave: Man! smurf weed! This guy is all about BEER from now on!

Steve and Samantha look at each other concerned.

Steve: That's ... smurf.

Dave: Be right back guys! I'm going to get myself SOME!

Dave takes the case of beer with him and leaves, kicking the front door off the hinges on his way out.

Steve: Ummmm... that was completely smurf, right?

Samantha: Yes Dad ... it was...

~~~

Dave goes back to the weed garage with the beer under his arm and with his free hand uses his super soldier strength to peel the garage door off like paper.

Woman: Hey man you're back man let's get right high together!

Dave: Weed is for jabberwocky!

Woman: Ummm ..... what?

Dave puts the beer on the table and rips off his hippie sweater.

Dave: I want a piece!

Woman: ...a piece of what?

Dave: Your skank bottom, jabberwocky! I'm gonna smurf the shazam! out of you and I likes my tickle fight DIRTY!!

Woman: Ummmmm ... ok?

~

Dave and the woman are covered in sweat as Dave has violent doggy style tickle fight from behind, spanking her bottom with his free hand and drinking with the other.

Woman: Dave .... you're hurting me!

Dave: THAT'S THE WAY I LIKES IT!!! *drinks*

~

Steve and Samantha are looking out the kitchen window trying to see what's going on in the weed garage. They see the garage shaking and hear many screams.

Samantha: Ummmm ... Dad ... what's going on?

Steve: I honestly don't know!

Suddenly they look over to see a fist come out of the weed garage!

Samantha: What the...

The wall of the weed garage is torn apart as Dave comes out wearing a robe and approaches the mansion.

Steve: Move back!

Steve and Samantha take a few steps up as Dave rips the wall out around the kitchen window and makes his way inside.

Steve: We have a door man!

Dave: Doors are for (extremely vulgar comments censored)

Steve (frantically covering his daughters ears): You can't say these things! There's a little girl over here!

Dave: I do what ever I want! You better learn!

Dave rips the fridge door off and grabs some more beer and then throws the fridge through another wall creating another opening that he leaves from.

Steve: USE DOORS YOU smurf!!

Dave flips off Steve with his free hand and gets in his car and leaves the driveway.

Steve: We gotta follow him!

Steve and Samantha grab some keys and run to their car in the driveway, no time to change out of their pajamas.

Steve: Wait ... I got to start being a good Dad ... I can't drive after drinking ... you drive.

Samantha: But I have no idea how to drive.

Steve puts his hand on Samantha's shoulder and gives her a stern look.

Steve: I believe in you!

Samantha: *gulp*

~~~

Samantha drives around wildly while Steve sits next to her drinking.

Samantha: Why are you still drinking!!!

Steve: To catch a drunk man ... I have to think like a drunk man....

Samantha: I'm scared!!!

Steve: It's easy, one foot deal makes you go and one makes you stop and you turn the wheel to where you want the car to go ... that's all there is to driving.

Samantha: Ok ... it's not so bad then if that's all I need to know.

Samantha blows through a red light and two stop signs and then spots Dave up ahead.

Samantha: I think that's him!

Dave is driving in his robe and covered in beer and then accelerates.

Dave: WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!

Dave crashes full speed into a clothing store as alarms go off!

Steve: Oh crap!!!

Samantha does a sketchy job stopping the car and her and Steve get out and look at the clothing store that is seriously damaged with Dave's car inside.

Steve: Crap .... this shazam! is crazy!

In the distance, a strange black car pulls up. We look inside the car to see Magnet hands in the front passenger seat and Regular Hands driving. In the back seat is this man in a purple costume that they met in a bar, using binoculars.

Purple Costume Man: That's him alright ... that's the man that killed my two cousins!

The Man gets out of his car and stretches his arms out to reveal these strange wings.

Purple Costume Man: It's time to avenge my fallen Glider Man family members ... for I am GLIDER MAN III!

Magnet Hands (still drunk): *hick* sweet! You're going to kill him right here and right now?

Glider Man III: Damn right, now listen to my plan!

Glider Man III climbs on to the roof of the car and holds on with his glider wings out.

Glider Man III (yelling): OK ... NOW DRIVE INTO HIM FULL SPEED!

Regular Hands: What???

Glider Man III: AT THE LAST MINUTE, TURN AWAY AND I'LL USE THE SPEED TO GLIDE INTO HIM!!!! HE'LL NEVER KNOW WHAT HIT HIM!

Magnet Hands: I love it!

Regular Hands: I don't!

Magnet Hands: Just do it!

Regular Hands pushes his foot to the gas and the car speeds up toward Steve and Samantha looking at the destroyed clothing store. The car picks up incredible speed! At the last possible moment, Regular Hands turns away and almost flips the car while Glider Man III glides off the car roof and is headed right for Steve!!!

*SMASH*!!!!!

Glider Man III actually misses Steve and crashes into the building right next to him with such force that he collapses on the ground and some bricks fall on him .... and he's clearly dead.

Samantha: Dad... look at that!

Steve: It's just one of the glider men, sweetie. Don't worry about it.

Regular Hands and Magnet Hands look back in the mirrors to see Glider Man III has failed.

Regular Hands: Can we go home now?

Magnet Hands: Very much so, yes. *sniff*

Regular Hands: ... are you crying?

Magnet Hands: No! But I will need you to wipe my eyes because ... I'm allergic.

Regular Hands: To what?

Magnet Hands: smurf YOU, THAT'S WHAT!

~

Steve and Samantha are still trying to figure out if Dave is ok ... but they can't quite make it into the store because of the damage.

*BLAST*!!!

Suddenly the debris flies outward from the store as Dave busts his way out. Steve quickly covers Samantha to avoid rocks and things hitting her. They then stand back up to see Dave .... in a leather jacket and do-rag and chains and stuff and looking way different.

Samantha: ...Weed Man?

Steve: ... Dave?

Dave: Neither ... from now on I'm.... (drinks a beer) ... BEER MAN!!!

Steve: Oh crap... not another one.

Samantha: Another what?

Steve: Dave has like 50 personalities.

Dave: Wahahahahahahhahahaahaha!

Suddenly a motor cycle gang drives by.

Steve: What the ... was that my son!?!?

Samantha: Oh Dad ... you're drunk.

After the motor cycle gang passes, another gang member rides up on his motorcycle that's a little behind.

Dave: Sweet, there's my ride!

Steve: What?

Dave does this awesome move where the motorcycle comes to pass him and Dave grabs the handle with his left hand and then clotheslines the gang member off the bike and expertly maneuvers himself into the seat and brings the bike to a stop while on it and also picks up the gang member's gun and checks it.

Dave: Sweet! So long jabberwocky!

Dave aims the gun at Steve and Samantha!

Steve: MOVE!!!!

Steve pulls Samantha into an alley and Dave fires ... at the tires of their car and flattens them. Steve and Samantha peek out the alley as Dave drives off in the motor cycle.

Dave: CATCH ME NOW SUCKERS!!!!

Steve and Samantha come out and look at their car that can no longer be used.

Samantha: Now what do we do!?

Steve: I don't even know anymore!

Suddenly a cop car pulls in with their sirens blaring.

Steve: Maybe the police can help us!

The police car pulls in fast and squaks their tires. Two officers get out with guns aimed at them.

Officer Michael: Put your hands up!

Samantha: We're the good guys!!!

Officer Clarence: You wrecked up my favourite clothing store! You're under arrest!!!

Steve: We didn't do it! It was my brother! He tried beer for the first time tonight and....

The officers get closer with their guns.

Officer Michael: Get in the car or we'll shoot!

Suddenly Samantha kicks the guns out of their hands and punches the officers out!

Steve: Samantha!!! You just knocked out police officers! You can't do that!

Samantha: But ... they were going to hurt us.

Steve: Alright ... well if they aren't going to be using their car ... or their guns....

Samantha and Steve raid the officers and steal their shazam!.

Steve: Let's go get my brother back!!

~~~

Steve and Samantha drive around town for a while trying to find Dave ... and then discover a wrecked up Liquor Store.

Steve and Samantha come out in cop uniforms with guns drawn. Neither uniform fits as Samantha's is loose and Steve's is tight.

Steve: Ok ... he's got to be around here somewheres.

Suddenly the liquor store walls blows apart and Dave comes out in his new leather jacket and attire with a bunch of beer.

Steve: Stop right there!

Steve and Samantha aim their guns.

Dave: You guys aren't cops!!!!

Dave takes his gun and aims it at them.

Dave: Now get away from me! You're ruining my party!

Dave opens fire as Steve and Samantha jump behind the cop car for cover. Steve and Samantha fire back as Dave takes cover from behind a wall. They shoot at each other for a length of time while ducking and eventually run out of bullets! Luckily nobody got shot!

Steve and Samantha come out.

Steve: Ok buddy ... we're all out of bullets ... now just come and sober up, ok?

Dave: YOU CAN'T STOP ME FROM DRINKING!!! NOW SHOVE OFF!!!

Dave runs at them and they get out of the way as Dave uses his super soldier strength to flip the cop car high in the air.

Dave: I'm having the TIME OF MY LIFE!!!

Suddenly an army of cop cars appears and Dave looks concerned while drinking.

Dave: Damn it, I don't have time to fight a bunch of cops! I just want to drink!!!

Dave runs away.

Steve: Wait!!!

Suddenly the cop cars approach and the new police chief gets out.

Police Chief Milton: Are you guys ok?

Steve: Ummmm..... (looking at Samantha)

Samantha: Yes, we're fine!

Police Chief Milton: Look like that mysterious man wrecked up another place.

Steve: Ummmmm ... sure did!

Steve is relieved that nobody realizes this is actually Weed Man.

Police Chief Milton: Well since your car is destroyed get in mine and we'll continue the chase!

Steve: Alright then!

Steve and Samantha get in the car and they all speed off with the rest of the cars.

Police Chief Milton: We're going to find this guy ... and we're going to damn well kill him!

Steve: Ummmm ... we don't have to kill him.

Police Chief Milton: Stop saying ummmm so damn much! And yes, we WILL have to kill this smurf!

Samantha: Isn't that extreme? I mean yes he is causing damage but I don't think he hurt anyone...

Police Chief Milton: Hey! I didn't become the newest chief of police by being soft! This city needs a good kick in the bottom! Things are going to change around here now that I'm the chief! And get some damn uniforms that fit!!

After searching for a while the group of police cars find Dave ... sitting at the end of a wharf drinking his bottom off.

All the officers get out and aim their guns, using their car doors as cover. Dave is now trapped in the wharf.

Dave: Damn it.

Police Chief Milton (on megaphone): Lay down and put your hands on your back!

Dave drinks his last beer and stands up.

Dave: GO smurf YOURSELVES!!!!

Dave begins to run at the cop cars!!

Police Chief Milton: That's it, open fire!

Steve: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!

Suddenly the army of police officers open fire and Dave gets shot multiple times. Steve witnesses this in slow motion and in horror. Each shot Dave takes a step back and blood flies all over until he finally falls into the water.

Steve and Samantha and the other cops rush to the end of the wharf to see Dave's lifeless body floating away.

Officer Carl: Should we retrieve the body, boss?

Police Chief Milton: No ... the seagulls and the sharks can have fun with that piece of trash!

Steve: There's no smurf sharks in that water!!!!

Police Chief Milton: That's it! I've had it with your sass! You're fired!

Samantha (crying): What's going on?!???

Police Chief Milton: You're fired too!

Steve: You can't fire me!!!

Steve rips off his badge and throws it in the lake.

Steve: I QUIT!

Police Chief Milton: Fine! I'll see to it that you both never work in this city again!

Police Chief Milton walks away angrily and all the officers prepare to leave.

Officer Roy: We got to get downtown! There's a major gang fight shoot-out happening!!!

Police Chief Milton: Damn this town!!!

Steve and Samantha look out to the water where Dave has drifted so far away he's out of sight.

Steve: *cry* this is like the 5th or 6th time I've had to see my poor brother die.

Samantha: This planet sucks!!!

Steve: I'm so sorry... I never thought life would be this bad or I would have never returned to Earth.... let's just go home now.

~~~

The next morning Steve and Samantha are having a very sad breakfast over the loss of Dave.

Samantha: I could have saved him ... I should have went after him as Glitter Girl and...

Steve: There's nothing we could have done...

Samantha: What are we going to do now.... we've lost so much.

Steve: We'll always have each other!

Suddenly Dave comes in the kitchen wearing some kind of pajamas with weed emblems on them.

Steve and Samantha look on in shock while holding their spoon fulls of cereal in mid air and with their mouths open.

Dave pours himself a bowl of fruit loops and cinnamon toast crunch. Dave sits with them on the kitchen table and prepares to eat the cereal.

Dave: Yeah ... *tokes* ... this is gonna be awesome!

Steve: Dave!!!! You're alive!!!!

Samantha: It's a miracle!!!

Dave: What are you guys talking about?

Steve: Man! You were shot like a 100 times last night, don't you remember???

Dave: Oh, really?

Dave reaches under his pajama shirt and pulls out a bullet.

Dave: That must be why I've been pulling out all these bullets out of me all morning.

Steve and Samantha are just staring in shock.

Dave: I just remember waking up on this wonderful island and then swimming home and getting high as shiiiiiiiit.

Samantha: You should be dead!!!

Dave: I dunno man... I guess I'm like unkillable or somethin.

Steve: Wow ... there's like no limits to your super soldier powers!

Dave coughs some bullets into his cereal.

Dave: Ooops.... I need more cereal.

Steve: Hey Dave, remember how we discovered that you should never stop smoking weed?

Dave: No, but it doesn't sound like anything I would ever like to do!

Steve: Good. Well also never drink alcohol, ok?

Dave: That doesn't sound like fun, I'm all about the weed, bro.

Steve and Samantha smiles.

~~~

Later, Dave goes back to his weed garage. Steve hired a bunch of people to fix up the mansion and the garage. One of the workers comes up to Dave.

Worker: Are you Weed Man?

Dave: What? No ... of course not.

Worker: But there's so much weed in that garage over there.

Dave: That's because ummmm ... I'm his supplier.

Worker: Ok then ... well anyway, this lady left a note for you.

Dave: Hmmm?

Dave reads the note.

Note: Dear Dave .... you've changed... I'm leaving you forever. It's too bad ... we could have been great together!

Dave tries to make out the signature but can't make it out due to messy writing.

Dave: Meh.

Dave crumples the note and tosses it aside.

~~~

Back to the caped man's garage. He's meeting with an electrician.

Caped Man: Can you fix it? I have tools in there I need to sharpen my knife!

The electrician looks at him funny.

Caped Man: ... because I'm a gardener.

Electrician: Right ... well I'm afraid that this electrical problem is worse then I thought ... I'm literally going to have to re-wire this entire garage!

Caped Man: Son of a jabberwocky.

The caped Man turns around and looks at his knife sadly.

Caped Man: Looks like you live a few more days Steroids Man ... but only a few more!

Electrician: You're weird.